Losing someone who is near and dear to your heart can be a traumatic event that will stay with you for the rest of your life. While it may get easier with time, you will always have a special place in your heart that will never feel quite right after they are gone. Everyone deals with death in a different way and it is important to respect the mourning process of each individual. The way that we deal with grief is the best way for our bodies to cope throughout this physically and mentally exhausting time.
You may have lost a family member or friend suddenly due to an accident such as a car crash. Or you may have lost a parent or child due to an illness and was fully aware that their last day on earth was coming for a while. Some people say that if you are prepared for a death, that it’s easier. Those people are usually the ones who haven’t had to deal with that type of death in the first place. Any type of death, whether it was unforeseen or predictable is difficult to deal with because either way, that person that you love is gone.
Even though everyone deals with death in their own way, there are a few things that can help almost everyone get through the rough patches.
Give Yourself Some Time to Breathe
If you are in charge of all the funeral preparations and hosting the after funeral get together at your home, you need some alone time to get your head together. This load is typically placed on someone who was closest to the deceased and it can often cause them to shut out their feelings so that they can focus on preparations and planning. You need to take some time to grieve whether it is alone in your room or while visiting a place in town that you used to go with your loved one. Don’t be afraid to hand off some of the responsibilities to others who are willing to help. No one is expecting you to do everything, and if someone is expecting that then this is not the time to deal with those types of people.
Try to Reflect on the Happier Times
Think back to before your family member was sick or the last time that you saw them smile and laugh. Dwelling on things that you could have done differently or how much they may have suffered will only put you in a deeper state of depression. Celebrate the life that your loved one lived and how they contributed to the happiness of others. This will be a comfort to yourself and others during this difficult time.
It Does Get Easier, in a sense
While you are not going to be able to snap your fingers and everything will go back to normal, it will get easier with time. Each passing day you will feel less and less depressed. You will never forget about the individual, but it will hurt a little less as time goes on. If you feel that things are only getting worse with time and you are feeling more depressed as the days go on, it may be time to get some help from a professional so that they can oversee a treatment plan for you or even provide you with some medication to help you get through this difficult time in your life. There is nothing wrong with getting professional help after a death has occurred. A therapist can provide you with helpful advice that others can’t during this time and they can help you learn how to cope in ways that the average person can’t.
Don’t Let Others Tell You How to Mourn
Remember that we all mourn in our own ways and no one can tell you when it is time to stop your own mourning process. If someone is giving you a hard time because of the way that you are dealing with a death, then you should remove that person from your life, if only temporarily. They will do nothing to help the situation and will only end up bringing you down. They did not have the same relationship that you had with the deceased so it is impossible for them to tell you how you should feel and when you should stop feeling sad about the situation. Block them on your phone and ignore them on social media if needed in order to get through this time in a peaceful manner.